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The Secrets of Champions: Relentless Discipline

6/30/2014

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The Secrets of Champions: Relentless Discipline
By Owen Fitzpatrick


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Earlier this year, I had the fortune to work in my capacity as a performance coach with the Stirling Clansmen (the 2014 American Football British National Champions). Although I played a very small part in helping them get in the right frame of mind to play their best, what I learned from observing them taught me some extremely valuable lessons.

The most important lesson that I learned was in observing what I call relentless discipline. The Stirling football coaches cultivated a culture on the team that was extremely impressive. They emphasised over and over again the essential need to be consistent in everything they did. They worked hard on the pitch and were well behaved off it. The importance of a code of behaviour was instilled quite brilliantly.

I’ve never had a more receptive audience than the 40 strong Stirling group. They were hungry for success and cohesively resonating with that hunger. They seemed to have a deep understanding that their conduct would determine how they would perform. Their values all seemed aligned.

To me, that is where relentless discipline comes from. It comes from the ability to communicate the importance of being a certain way in all aspects of your behaviour. For to become a champion, you really must become a champion. These champions became champions before they won the title. They became champions by how they acted. They acted like any great sporting icon. They worked as hard as they could work. They supported each other and they respected their opposition and anyone involved in the game.

I see discipline as the art of getting yourself to consistently behave in a certain way regardless of how you feel. When I go to the gym, I rarely go because I’m excited about it. I go because I know it’s really important for me. I made that decision because I decided I would value it. I made that decision because I decided to become that kind of person.

We often look to our behaviour to define who we are. When this team looked at their own behaviour, they could see real professionalism. They could see champions. This ensured that their discipline became relentless.

The trick is, if we want to succeed in any chosen area of life, we need to value relentless discipline as being exceptionally important. We need to remind ourselves that success isn't easy and the choices about how hard we are going to work and how consistently we will do so is going to determine whether we are successful or not. The beautiful thing is that it is up to us. It is up to what we choose to give value to. And we need to see ourselves as ‘that kind of person’. That’s a secret of champions.


Owen Fitzpatrick is an International Trainer and Practical Psychologist. He is co-author of six books which have been translated into more than a dozen languages. Owen is also co-founder of the Irish Institute of NLP, the largest NLP training company in Ireland. He is also a qualified Psychologist, Psychotherapist and Hypnotherapist. Owen has also featured as the presenter expert on his primetime television show 'Not Enough Hours' on Irish Television.

Note: Check out Owen's newest bestseller, the sequel to "Conversations" called " Memories: Hope is the Question"
You can post your comments about the book on Facebook

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Sharp: Strategies for Optimal Thinking and Behavior

10/24/2013

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Sharp
Strategies for Optimal Thinking and Behavior
by John G. Johnson

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“Can you recommend some CD’s on hypnosis that I can listen to, because I want to be smarter?” Alan asked me (name changed to protect the so-called innocent). I've never been asked this before, not until now. It’s not for me to pass judgment on any inquiries. No matter how unique they may be. For we want what we want in order to satisfy values, intentions, needs, wants or desires.

You don’t have to look very far to find an infinite amount of hypnosis-based products promising all types of gains. I could have easily recommended several to Alan, and that would have been the end of it, much like the automatic behaviors we engage in, for example, shaking hands. One person first extends their hand. The other person - without thought - reciprocates. Both hands meet, resulting in a handshake.

Alan said something which made me curious. To be specific, it was a word he used- “smart!” What did Alan mean? What was his definition of that particular word?

I had options at this point: I could’ve asked Alan to clarify what he meant by the word, or to clarify what he meant by the statement. Or even to ask how does he know that a hypnosis product will give him what he wants?...

I did none of the above. Instead, I went in search of this word’s history. I discovered it (smart) comes from the Old-English term “smeart” which had several related meanings: sharp, precise, trim, quick wit, active, clever. This utterance got diluted over time, and lost some of its initial meaning. Today everyone uses this word (smart) in their own way.

It turned out what Alan really wanted was to be more precise in his thinking - at certain times - and on specific topics important to him, so that he felt more satisfied, more confident with actions he took afterwards. Put another way, tools for better decision-making were what he wanted.

If we want to be in a position where we are certain we’re making the best decision(s) possible, satisfied with the actions we’ve taken, have options to choose from, and feel good about the choices we’ve made, - the output, then it’s best to gather as much information possible about the subject we are focused on. This is the input phase.  Tools to help you do that are abundant, with the most direct one being – questions! The quality of your answers rests on the quality of your questions.

The Meta Model or Journalistic Questions are great tools to help you to generate quality information-gathering questions. The more information you have, the better the processing strategies your mind will engage in. Think about it. The mind needs something to work on. The great writers, past and present (and future ones), understand that in order to write, to produce a meaningful piece of work, they must – read! Read to write. “Reading” doesn’t imply books only, but reading the world, the environment you live in and are surrounded by. This act of reading for the writer, this immersion, is really the information-gathering phase, or, as advertising executive, Tor Myhren, calls it “inspiration overload,” the step that gets his creative juices moving.

Another key driver for success is our state of mind. For if we are seeking to enhance the quality of our thoughts and behaviors we need to take this into account. There is a specific state for a specific activity! What states of mind do you think: endurance swimmer, Diana Nyad, the fastest man alive, Usain Bolt, Bookkeeper, Antoinette Tuff, world-class public speakers, or even individuals who've changed the world, entertain, so they can perform at an optimal level? This then begs the question: “What states of mind must you activate if you want to produce the right thoughts and actions?”

Other strategies for input are:
  • Having and experiencing multiple points of views on a single subject.
  • Putting yourself in situations that cause you to grow, to learn. In other words, get out of your comfort zone. 
  •  Self-reflection.
  • Exercise: The brain is a glutton for glucose and oxygen. Getting the body moving triggers all kinds of responses within the body and mind. Some of the greatest ideas individuals have had in their lives came to them while exercising. 

©2013 John G. Johnson All rights reserved! Subscribe to our mailing list for workshops, newsletters and events. Go to:  www.nlpsuccessbydesign.com


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Nouns Versus Verbs: Which has the Power?

10/24/2013

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Nouns versus Verbs:
Which has the power?

Most of us take for granted, the language we use with ourselves. Language not only moves us consciously, it also influences us on the unconscious level.

In the clip, Simon Sinek demonstrates the differences between nouns, verbs (& verb phrases) and the dynamic impact they have on our behavior, for example when creating goals or satisfying a personal value.

Note:.... PAY ATTENTION to your internal sensations – notice the differences.


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What Cicero can Teach us about Persuasion and Public Speaking

10/23/2013

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What Cicero can Teach us about Persuasion and Public Speaking
                                                                                          by Owen Fitzpatrick

Public speaking is an art form that many would love to master. Whether you need to give a best man’s speech at your brother’s wedding or you must present an idea at the monthly network meeting, public speaking is a skill many people seek. At present, since I’m busy just having launched the upcoming Charisma Bootcamp, I thought I’d share some thoughts on the matter.

Cicero was a politician of ancient Rome who is widely known for his prowess at public speaking and rhetoric. Having studied some of the greatest speakers from Greece at the time, Cicero became a powerful figure largely through his ability to inspire and move his audience. So, what are some of the keys we can learn from Cicero and his skills of oratory?

Cicero explained that there were five elements important to consider when creating a speech and making an argument. They are:

1) Invention
2) Arrangement
3) Style
4) Memory
5) Delivery


Let’s go through each one and explore how we can use this system.

Invention:

This is exactly what it sounds like. The first key is to ask yourself the question what is the goal of your speech? When you create anything, that is a good question to ask. Once you identify what you want, the next step is to list out all the different ideas or concepts that might help you make this happen. It is a good idea to figure out what is the message you want to deliver to the audience.

Arrangement:

This is how you structure your speech. This is broken up into Introduction, Main Body and Conclusion. Your Introduction should introduce your message, establish your credibility and connect with the audience. It should also capture their attention from the outset. You main body should share fact, evidence, stories, examples using both logic and emotion to influence your audience. You should acknowledge any arguments which counteract your one and dismiss them using logic and reason. The conclusion should then drill home your message and leave them with a good feeling connected to it.

Style:

This is how you write or prepare your speech. The words you use must fulfill the following criteria. They must be simply put, clear, vivid, fit with the expectations of and in the same language as the audience and lastly, the words must sound good out loud. When you read out what you have written you will get a good sense of what sounds good and what doesn’t.

Memory:

This reflects how you manage to remember the key concepts. It is a good idea to practice creating hooks that you attach each idea to. This means try to fit your speech into a story or connect the main concepts to a mind map or picture. This allows you to use a device to immediately remind you of what the next part of the speech is. Often powerpoint or keynote can suffice here.

Delivery:

This is how you actually deliver the speech. Your facial expressions, eye contact and use of your voice are key factors in presenting your speech powerfully. When you tell a story of something that made you cringe, cringe when you talk about it. During your speech keep making eye contact with the audience and stay a few seconds on each of them. Use variety in your tone of voice and pace of speech. Make sure that when you make an important point you slow down and emphasize the point.

So, let’s take the example of making a best man speech.

Invention:

  • What are the main goals of the speech?
  • Who do you have to thank?
  • Who do you have to complement?
  • What do you want the audience to know and feel?
  • How do you want to present your relationship with the groom?
  • How do you want the groom to feel?
  • What are the best stories you have of your time spent with the groom?

Arrangement:

  • What joke or funny story can you start with?
  • How do you want to introduce yourself?
  • How can you best connect with the audience? What will they relate to?
  • Where will you do the ‘thank you’ part of the speech?
  • Which stories will you tell? (usually picking 2 or 3 is perfect)
  • What order will you tell the stories in?
  • How will you finish the speech? (sentimental or funny)

Style:

  • Is the vast majority of your speech something that everyone can relate to?
  • What do you need to explain in order for everyone to understand the stories?
  • When you choose the stories to tell, how can you make them more vivid?
  • When you read the speech aloud, does it sound good?
  • How can you make it sound better?

Memory:

  • Use cue cards if you need to with the main keys of the speech written as words to remind you.
  • How can you link the stories together so that each one reminds you of the next?
  • How can you remind yourself of all the different people to thank?

Delivery:

  • How can you tell the stories in the best possible way?
  • What accents can you do or impersonate to really make the stories more vivid?
  • How can you include the crowd on any of the jokes?
  • How can you use variety in your tone of voice to make it more entertaining?



Owen Fitzpatrick is an inspiring, engaging and entertaining speaker  NLP Master Trainer, specialized in Charisma, co-author of 'Conversations with Dr. Richard Bandler' , co- author of ‘Choose Freedom’, an international bestseller. ‘Not Enough Hours’, a bestseller in the Irish Times Bookcharts and ‘NLP for Charisma’. Owen was the presenter and expert of the primetime show ‘Not Enough Hours’. He  is co-founder of the Irish Institute of NLP along with Brian Colbert. Founder of the Online Charisma Training Academy", and author of the soon to published book "The Charismatic Edge," as a trainer Owen is one of the most well respected authorities in the area of NLP:  www.owenfitzpatrick.com
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September 05th, 2013

9/5/2013

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                           Behind it All
                                                                                   by John G. Johnson

Like it or not humans are always learning. And we learn quickly. It’s not just our minds that learn, but our bodies as well.Sometimes a single experience  is all it takes. Rapid learning can occur when an  experience is unique, novel and accompanied by a heightened emotion. What’s interesting is that the more this learning event occurs, the more it becomes a stronger aspect of our being, hard-wired, so to speak, thus  leading us to create “conclusions,” “rules” “a point of view” “beliefs,” etc. about this unique event. Take for example, going to a restaurant and eating a meal that upsets your stomach. The next time around, you’ll most likely be cautious of either the restaurant in question or the same meal. However, if you  decide to give the same place and meal another try, and if the same thing occurs - again - then you’ll definitely build even stronger conclusions either about that establishment or the meal.  In fact, it’s how phobias are created - the body has learned to respond in a particular way that’s usually undesirable.

There’s another way we learn and acquire knowledge, and that’s through detecting patterns. Our minds are continuously scanning for and cataloging patterns in our environment. The interesting thing is that this pattern-detection activity takes place at a level that’s  -  below our awareness! Inferences are then derived from these patterns, manifesting in the form of, attitudes, beliefs or ideas, etc.

There are times, however, when these patterns are made available to our conscious minds. This gives now us the opportunity to discover the source of our present attitudes and conclusions about a provocative subject in question. This revelation also now puts us  in an immediate position to decide whether a specific attitude, belief, etc is useful to hold onto - or not.

But oftentimes these patterns aren't made available to us consciously. And all that we are aware of are just the “conclusions,” and their various forms, be that attitudes, beliefs, gut-feelings, rules, ideas etc., that seem to just “exist” without a source. A simple exercise to prove this is to list as many of the attitudes, beliefs, conclusions and ideas you are aware of, and then  ask yourself how did you come to acquire them. This unconscious pattern-detection mechanism has kept our species alive for millions of years. So, too, has our ability to infer and to generalize from these patterns as well. We use what we have concluded, (attitudes, beliefs, gut-feelings, rules, ideas etc.) as rudders in our lives which influence our: behaviors, thoughts and how we see the world. But this mechanism does have its flaws:

IF YOU are having trouble accomplishing a sought-after goal or activity, regardless of whatever field you are in (personal or professional), or are dissatisfied with your level of performance in a specific arena, then it’s useful to examine your attitudes, beliefs, even the excuses you create as to why a certain outcome is the way it is surrounding the context in question. And then  - challenge them!:  

  • Are they helping you to move in the direction of your choice?
  • Are there counter-examples to what you believe to be true?
  • Are there more useful beliefs, attitudes and points of views to adopt that can serve you better?

We don’t have to prisoners of our thoughts and experiences.Success in any endeavor requires that useful beliefs, ways of seeing and even attitudes be adopted, because, as stated before, they act as rudders  influencing our behaviors and the choices we make that push and pull us in the direction we choose. 


©2013 John G. Johnson All rights reserved! Subscribe to our mailing list for workshops, newsletters and events. Go to:  www.nlpsuccessbydesign.com



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Start with WHY

9/5/2013

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WHY do you do what you do?  How do leaders inspire themselves, people and the world into action? You can do it, too. Watch Simon Sinek’s  TEDx presentation.

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How to Let Go of Fear

9/5/2013

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                        How to Let Go of Fear
                                                                                                  by Tina Taylor

Fear is part of our survival instinct; it sets our body and mind in motion in preparation for a perceived threat.  It’s hard wired into the subconscious and is one of our oldest emotions; sometimes generated without any conscious awareness.  We feel uneasy, yet don't know why.  It makes us jump when something moves on the ground or touches us, makes us blink when something is coming towards our eyes.  We respond due to sensory input driving us into action.

Fear makes you focus.  There’s a moment of awareness, with our unconscious telling us something isn't right, and as we sense "something" we freeze.  This freezing may stop predators from seeing us it also gives us a chance to evaluate the situation and if it is OK we continue - returning to what we were doing.

Fear is all about chemicals, epinephrine and norepinephrine; epinephrine (adrenaline) is secreted by the adrenal glands.  These chemicals are released in moments of fear to prepare us for the fight or flight response; and changes occur to improve chances of survival.  As well as increased strength an increase in oxygen increases sensory acuity whilst non-survival process like digestion are put on hold.

Fears and phobias are extreme anxieties.  As we go through life we learn a great many things by experience, things we are not even aware of.  An unconscious learning, fear is one of these experiences and is a demonstration of how quickly we learn an automatic response.

From one experience the mind can generalize and attach fear.  Then the flight or fight response kicks in.  Your imagination is far more powerful than conscious will and the area of the brain that you use to imagine something is the same area that is used when experiencing things.  Which is why your nervous system can’t tell the difference between a real or vividly imagined experience.

For an event to be coded as traumatic its said that four conditions need to be met.  First it needs to be a emotional event; second, have a meaning for the individual; third, the chemicals need to be in place and fourth the experience is perceived as inescapable.  If these are present it is possible that the brain will categorize the event as traumatic.

And yet there could be 2 people at the same event and one will be traumatized whilst the other will not.  How can this happen?

Life is full of traumatic moments, in order for an event to be traumatizing it must produce an emotional response.  Meaning is attached to the event, and whereby one person may code something as traumatic another may not.  A good example of this is those who are afraid of riding on roller coasters, they produce the four conditions in their mind and they know its scary and dangerous; whereas someone who loves roller coasters will have all the same conditions in place yet they love the thrill of the ride.

Our feelings are created by the way in which we think of something; for example someone scared of spiders may be creating an image in their mind of a larger than life spider which is scaring them.  Our fears may have begun due to specific event in our lives but these tend to evolve to a point whereby it’s the thought of the event/situation that causes the feeling rather than the situation/event itself.

There are a number of ways in which you can change the way you feel. One of these is: as you notice a feeling of anxiety/panic begin.

1.       Breathe in gently and slowly through your mouth when your lungs are full hold your breath for 10 seconds then.
2.       Breath out slowly through your nose.
3.      Breath in slowly through your mouth and hold your breath for 5 seconds.
4.      Breath out slowly through your nose.
5.      Continue breathing this way for a couple of minutes at which point the anxiety will have subsided.



Tina Taylor is one of the UK's sought after Licensed Master Trainers of NLP & Hypnotherapists, having been trained by and then assisting Paul McKenna & Dr. Richard Bandler.  With experience in the Human Resources sector, Tina has worked both on a consultancy basis and full-time for major corporations in the City of London.  Within her private practice, this diverse background has allowed her to create and provide some very unique services such as assisting couples with fertility issues and to help create a comfortable childbirth experience as well as coaching and hypnotherapy within the south of England to many individuals and companies.

Tina Taylor’s new CD, How to Let go of Fear, can teach you ways in which you can change your response’s and take back control of your thought processes.





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It’s Time: Three strategies to gain the most from the time you have

6/2/2013

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                    It’s Time
                                               Three strategies to gain the most from the time you have
                                                                                          by John G. Johnson

Most of us lead a multitude of lives in today’s world. Adding to this, we perform a wide array of activities throughout the course of a single day… and then multiply that by seven. The result? Little to no time is left for us to appreciate the finer things in life. It’s no secret that we live in a world of consequences, so over-stressing ourselves, suppressing opportunities for personal rejuvenation will have a negative impact on our mind and body. “To every action there’s an equal and opposite reaction” is a fundamental law of physics. This law applies to human beings as well, meaning the way we live our lives.

The benefits of taking time out for yourself cannot be overstated. However, oftentimes, this classic refrain, better known as an “excuse,” frequently can be heard… “If only there were more hours in the day, then I could get everything done.” And then there’s the popular belief that most people subscribe to because they are convinced that certain tasks need to get done…or else: “it’s impossible! I don’t have time. I have too many things to do!”

These imaginary reasons, excuses, fantasies, etc. imply that we have little to no control over our lives, and that outside forces - not us – are responsible for the life we choose to live. This couldn’t be further from the truth; it’s clearly not a useful attitude to support!.... Beliefs of any sort, or any particular point-of-view one adopts, aren’t cast with and set in concrete. Meaning, they can change.

Twenty-four hours make a day; seven days make a week. It’s the reality we have to work within. Since this is the case, then it’s more useful to perceive time differently and ask ourselves “How we can work with what we have in an efficient manner so as to move towards a higher quality of life?”

The following are three such strategies.


Order of Importance
Last month we spoke about values and asking the question, “What’s important to me in X?” We can ask this same question when it comes to ordering your list of things-to-do for a day or week.  When you make your list, (day or week), prioritize your activities from – most important things to get done to least important things to get done. (Think of an inverted pyramid). Organizing your tasks this way has several advantages:

One, you will be able to see that what you thought was important to get done isn’t so after all. You now will have the choice of discarding those less-important activities to free up some time. It’s sort of like deleting non-essential files on your computer’s hard-drive to create additional space.

Two, in many instances, taking care of the most important things has the added advantage of simultaneously completing minor tasks as well. Think of it as collateral benefits – two (or several) for the price of one, so to speak.


Learning to Say “No!”
Think about it. How many times do we say “YES” to activities – without – taking into consideration the full consequences they will have on us and on the quality of time we want for ourselves? The reasons why we say “yes” to tasks are too numerous to mention. But learning to say “NO” to deadweight activities is a useful habit to embrace.


Breathe!...
Take a moment to breathe –focused rhythmic breathing, for at least three minutes. This activates what Dr. Herbert Benson calls The Relaxation Response, a heightened physiological state deep rest that allows the body and mind to take a break and restore itself. Many breathing techniques for accessing this state of focused rest abound. One simple strategy is to: Breathe in for four counts, hold for three counts, and then exhale for eight counts. Repeat for at least three-minutes. That’s it. If you find your mind wandering, that’s fine. Just return back to your task. It’s like physical exercise; the more you practice the better your focus becomes.

From the womb to the tomb, time is already pre-determined for us, so we can say it’s limited. It’s not how much time we have, quantity-wise – it’s what we do with it - quality-wise - that makes life worth living.


©2013 John Johnson All rights reserved! Subscribe to our mailing list for workshops, newsletters and events. Go to:  www.nlpsuccessbydesign.com
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Jim Rohn: On Setting Goals (part 2-2)

6/2/2013

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Almost Instant State Change

6/2/2013

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                                              Almost Instant State Change
                                                                        By Kevin Creedon (1960 - 2013)


Think of a problem. Those four words are used repeatedly throughout NLP trainings because most of the time NLP techniques are used in a prescriptive manner. That means that, after the fact, we can examine a problem, make new choices and mentally rehearse a more ideal performance in the future. But what about those events that we didn't prepare for? Is it possible to shift from negative feelings to more resourceful feelings in the moment, without prior planning or an external trigger?

 Shift Happens
I remember a time when I had to travel from New York to Boston for an important family event. Very early on a hot August morning, I went to pick up the rental car I had reserved a week before. The rental agent told me that, because some cars hadn’t been returned yet, I'd have to wait until one came in or make other arrangements. I finally got a car—two hours later. Now I was stuck in morning rush hour. Worse, there was a lot of repaving being done on the highway and the heat left a lot of overheated cars stalled on the road.

When I finally got to Boston (having missed the wedding and most of the reception) I was in an awful mood. One of my nephews, who was six at the time, asked me why I was so grumpy. I told him the whole story: the car rental, the traffic, the heat... And then he said, "But Uncle Kevin, you're not driving now."

Instant state change! One moment, I'm grumpy and reliving all the unpleasantness of the morning, and the next I'm enjoying myself.

At that point, I knew that positive state changes could happen suddenly, and faster than any NLP technique I had learned so far. But I didn't know how to generate them for myself. They were always a reaction to something external, usually something someone else said to me. Yet I was very curious about how we could learn to do the same thing for ourselves.

 Emotions are Choices
William Glasser, M.D. in his book Choice Theory makes a strong case for the idea that emotions are choices, even when they don’t feel like it. Using my trip to Boston as an example, he would say that the reason I was grumpy with my family was not because I spent most of the day stuck in traffic, but because at the reception I was choosing to generate grumpy emotions.

Whether or not emotions are choices is true, it is a very useful assumption. Here's an experiment. Pretend that you are grumpy and mentally label your experience each of these ways:

1. I am grumpy.
2. I am feeling grumpy.
3. I am choosing to feel grumpy.


What are the differences for you? Which gives you the greatest freedom (and responsibility)?

When I taught my first Master Practitioner class, at graduation one of my students told me that he had just solved a big mystery: that much of what I taught in class was geared toward recognizing that we can choose how we feel. This was a powerful revelation for him—he had spent much of his life being angry, thinking he had no choice about it. He asked me why I didn't just tell everyone at the start that emotions can be chosen. "Who would have believed me?" I asked him.

Some people try to suppress or hide their emotions. Others venerate them, with the idea that ALL emotions have to be fully expressed, preferably with an audience, before an emotion is complete. I don't think emotions should be suppressed or avoided, but I’m surprised how often what I’m feeling seems to have been chosen blindly, without considering more than one possibility.

Here's another experiment to illustrate the ephemeral nature of emotions. Think of a small task that you can do, should get done and have been putting off. When you think about it, what emotions do you feel?

Next, ask yourself "Is there any reason I can't put off deciding how I'll feel about doing this until after it's done?"

Notice what happens. In my experience, both with myself and with my students and clients, if the answer is no, the negative feeling spontaneously disappears and we go and do the thing that we had been putting off.

Kevin Creedon's work lives on in and throughout the lives of the people he's touched in his unique way. A part of his legacy has been captured and preserved on this best-selling DVD - Bang Bang!


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Valuing Values

4/13/2013

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Valuing Values
by John G. Johnson

Anne Marie worked hard to finally secure her coveted, hi-profile dream job, one which had glamour, power, and prestige attached to it. The job gave Anne Marie the ability to influence the direction of politics and policies in the USA and around the world. It also kept her at the office until the wee hours of the morning - and away from home for extended periods as well. This dream job did have its perks though: Trips to exotic countries, attending exclusive engagements and ritzy events, mingling and dining with titans of industries and influential heads of state.

Ann Marie thought she had it all. But in less than two years she called it quits, giving up the position she fought to get, saying it wasn’t what she thought it would be. Why? The demands of the job weren’t fulfilling a personal need, a value important to her – family. She had a husband and two teenage boys who she wanted to spend more time with.

To understand one of the reasons people do the things they do we need to look at “Values.” Values are subjective; they vary from person to person and are contextual.  This means that what’s important you, what you are valuing in a career, for example, will be different from what’s important to you when it comes to owning pair of shoes. In short, a person’s behavior oftentimes is satisfying the values they consider dear to them in a particular context. The good thing is that values aren't set in stone; like human beings, they can change over time. If we work from this premise, then in order to learn what someone’s values are in a given scenario, all we need to do is ask: – What’s important to you in X? And Listen! (x = specific context: For example, family, friends, career, car, clothes, vacation, etc.

Ann Marie’s situation, of achieving a goal and then abandoning it, isn’t rare. As observers we are sometimes stunned by the actions of certain individuals, people who are in the public eye, or within our own private social circles. From our point-of-view we think what they did was bizarre, prompting us to say something like, “Why did they give it all up? They had it all. “I” would have never done what they did. I don’t get it, etc.” To the outsider, upon first glance, Ann Marie’s decision to quit seems strange. But asking the question above, in order to unearth what her values are in the context of a career, would show that by leaving the dream job, no matter how attractive it was, Ann Marie was adhering to her values. Spending time with her family is important to her. The rigors of the job prevented this from happening. So she did the next best thing…

Values give rise to behavior. So before we go condemning someone for an action they took that you clearly wouldn’t have if you were in their shoes, so to speak, dig a little deeper and find out that person’s values are in that given context and were they (values) being satisfied.

There are times that humans do have to endure the gauntlet to discover what’s important to them. But we can save ourselves time and eliminate, if not, reduce disappointment in advance when we:

 1= Ask ourselves the same question posed above (What’s important to you in X?) and - pay attention - to the answers and emotions that arise.

2= Write down the answers you get.

3= Then find out if the desired goal or behavior you seek will fulfill these values.



©2013 John Johnson All rights reserved! Subscribe to our mailing list for workshops, newsletters and events. Go to:  www.nlpsuccessbydesign.com
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Jim Rohn: On Setting Goals (part 1-2)

4/12/2013

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The Art of Relating

4/12/2013

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                           The Art of Relating
                                                                                          By Owen Fitzpatrick

One of the most important distinctions I have learned about relationships is the different between ‘having a relationship’ and ‘relating to your partner’. Far too often, we talk about it and think about it as if it is a static entity. The truth is that you and your partner are constantly changing, evolving and your relationship is too.

By seeing your relationship as a still object, you fall into the trap of not reminding yourself to continuously ‘relate’ in the most effective way. When you change this perspective and you begin to explore ways of relating to your loved ones, you can have a massively positive impact on the relationship itself. Of course the very word relationship puts a sort of limit on the concept as a noun… but I am more talking about the way that we actually relate to the concept.

For example, some people say that they are ‘in’ a relationship and not ‘having’ one. This can be okay as long as we are thinking of the relationship as something that is traveling and moving. Far too often, we find ourselves struggling with the fact that what once worked with the other person no longer does. By reminding yourself that you need to continuously relate, it makes things a million times easier.

Relating itself is about learning from the person what they are thinking and feeling and what they need and want from you as well as expressing your own needs and wants to them in the most effective way possible. When your ‘relationship’ is no longer taken for granted you get to do this is really wonderful ways!




Owen Fitzpatrick is an inspiring, engaging and entertaining speaker  NLP Master Trainer, specialized in Charisma, co-author of 'Conversations with Dr. Richard Bandler' , co- author of ‘Choose Freedom’, an international bestseller. ‘Not Enough Hours’, a bestseller in the Irish Times Bookcharts and ‘NLP for Charisma’. Owen was the presenter and expert of the primetime show ‘Not Enough Hours’. He  is co-founder of the Irish Institute of NLP along with Brian Colbert. Founder of the Online Charisma Training Academy", and author of the soon to published book "The Charismatic Edge," as a trainer Owen is one of the most well respected authorities in the area of NLP:  www.owenfitzpatrick.com


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Become that You

10/12/2012

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              Become that You…                                                                               by                                                                                  by John G. Johnson

I just finished reading The Five Major Pieces to the Life Puzzle, written by celebrated business-leader and trailblazer the late Jim Rohn. The book is based on what Mr. Rohn believed are the five pillars for success:

  • Philosophy – the thoughts you adopt and live by.
  • Attitude – the energy and intent you give to a situation.
  • Action - what you do.
  • Results – metrics- progress and results how you are moving towards your goal. 
  • Lifestyle - the kind of life you create for yourself by adopting the four principles above.

Not only did Mr. Rohn have a unique life perspective, he was clearly skilled in reframing scenarios into useful and empowering points of views. And he was famous for his quotes as well. For example, “Your income is related to your philosophy, not to the economy!” (How relevant is this today). Mr. Rohn’s common sense writing style can easily lead someone to think his book is a quick read. However, any serious reader will realize that The Five Major Pieces to the Life Puzzle is laden with thought-provoking insights that are worth reflecting upon. Take for example – Mr. Rohn’s statement that:…

“…Success is something you attract by the person you become…Success is not something you pursue. (That’s like chasing a butterfly. You just quite can’t catch it)… Success is something you attract by being an attractive person….

What does Mr. Rohn mean by “success” and “attractive”? To most people the words automatically convey ‘money’ and ‘beauty’. But there are so many other definitions – that’s personal to everyone. Regardless of the myriad of associations those words call up, if we take the entire statement as a whole one of things we can conclude is that: Stagnation doesn't work; if what you are doing isn't working, meaning you don’t like the feedback you are receiving, then you need to adjust, grow, change, acquire the necessary tools – whatever those need to be - to help get you to your destination.

I’m reminded of two real-life examples: ONE - Debra Ehrhardt struggled for years in both New York City and Hollywood to become an established stage actress. This was her life-long dream; it’s what she trained for many years to be. She did everything “within the expected box” trying make things happen. You name it Debra did it… Auditions after auditions, sending out resumes and head-shots, responding to casting calls, etc... And still no one gave her any roles. She came close… but, still – nothing.

Debra realized that if wanted to be a working actress then things had to change; she had to become more than just an actress. Fortunately, unrestrained desire and ambition were on Debra’s side. If no one wanted to offer her a role, give her a break, then she would write her own roles. She learned the craft of playwriting and the business production side of the theatre industry and then mounted one-person plays in which - she – was the: producer, promoter as well as its star.

Her first play attracted network TV executives who eventually bought it. That being history, and still hungry to work the stage, Debra wrote a second one-person play, and won numerous prestigious awards for it. Her current play, Jamaica Farewell, in which she’s once again the producer, promoter and star, continues to be performed in sold-out theatres in the USA, Canada, Europe, South America and the Caribbean. It also caught the attention of a serious hi-profile movie mogul and is currently in the process of being turned into a major motion-picture.

TWO- Poverty and  a lower caste family was what Kalpana Saroj was born into in India. Strangers, even family members called her horrible names when she was young. Getting beaten up on her daily eight mile trek to school and forbidden to drink from certain water wells was a common occurrence. Kalpana’s mother even told her to accept her fate, meaning there was no way out. At twelve Kalpana was forced into an abusive marriage. She eventually defied social pressures and left it, but doing so had its negative social consequences. Too much to tolerate, Kalpana tried taking her life - but survived.

This proved to be a turning point. She now had several options:(one), accept her fate as her mother said, (two), do a better job of  taking her life, or (three), change her circumstances for the better – something people within her caste rarely had achieved. Kalpana took option three…to live the life that she wanted, despite what others expected and thought of her because of her social status – an untouchable.

Kalpana left her tiny village, made her way to the big city, Mumbai, and got a job in the garment industry paying her 15-cents a day. She taught herself how to use a variety of commercial sewing equipment which made her marketable, and as a result saw her income rise. At age twenty, she applied and received a government loan and opened her first business. It turned out that she had the gift for running a business. One successful venture led to another to the point that people who had a failing enterprise - regardless of what caste they came from - sought her consultation and offered her highly lucrative business opportunities. All this culminated in her becoming a titan in business. Today, in her early fifties, Kalpana’s worth millions and her combined companies are valued at over 100 million dollars. In addition to that, she met a businessman whom she married – by choice!

We can infer a lot from these examples. One thing is for sure: Debra Ehrhardt and Kalpana Saroj are successful by their standards. Both had to become more than what they were, doing whatever it took, whether it was by acquiring new skills, cultivating the appropriate mental attitude, adopting a new philosophy, etc. so they could change their circumstances and design a lifestyle on their terms. “…Success is something you attract by the person you become…”


©2012 John Johnson All rights reserved! Subscribe to our mailing list for workshops, newsletters and events. Go to:  www.nlpsuccessbydesign.com

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Jim Rohn: Preparation for Success

10/12/2012

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The Psychology of Money, Prosperity and Wealth

10/1/2012

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The Psychology of Money, Prosperity and Wealth
By: Kristine Hallbom and Armand D'Alo

What stops people from succeeding financially and having ongoing prosperity in their life? The answer is generally focused around the belief that financial success is not a possibility. There are many people who have unconscious barriers that prevent them from having the wealth and abundance that they deserve.

If you have limiting beliefs about money at an unconscious level, it will be difficult to move though your financial limitations because your unconscious mind will dampen your efforts to succeed. This is why some people end up living from paycheck to paycheck their whole life--because at some level they don't believe that they're capable of doing better.

At a conscious level, most people think they're doing everything possible to achieve their goals. However, there still might be some unconscious part of them that doesn't believe they can obtain success. The more a person avoids that unconscious part, the more obstacles will continue to show up in their every day life. That's the way the mind works.

For example, think of all the people you know who read the think and grow rich books, attend financial seminars, say daily affirmations, and still have money problems. All of these things they're doing are worthwhile, yet they often don't get to the "core" of their issue, which usually involves some type of limiting belief.

People have many different unconscious beliefs about money. Some of the more common ones we've come across are:

·         You have to work hard to make money.
·         I will never be rich.
·         Having money isn't spiritual.
·         Life is a struggle.
·         Money is hard to manage.
·         You need money to make money.
·         It's too late in my life to think about getting wealthy.
·         I don't have the magic ingredient that is necessary to be successful.
·         I can't be successful because my parents weren't successful.

These types of beliefs limit people because they're looking for the answers outside of themselves, when in reality the keys to prosperity exist within themselves. Wealth is not what a person has. It is a state of mind. The people who succeed in life from a financial perspective have positive beliefs about money, wealth and prosperity. They understand that wealth is an internal experience.

Instead of focusing on all the possible ways to get rich, many people spend a lot of time obsessing about what they don't have. An interesting pattern develops in which they become angry or resentful over their situation, which creates more limitations and barriers in their lives. It's so easier to get ahead in life when you're coming from a peaceful state of mind, versus an angry or resentful frame of mind.

The first step in understanding the unconscious patterning of a person's financial situation is to explore the deeper nature of how they represent money.

For example, a person with money issues may have had parents who lived in poverty, and they subsequently formed a "Depression Era" mentality. Hence, an unconscious belief was developed that the person will always have to struggle financially because that's what their parents did. Or they might have had a parent tell them over and over again that they'll never be successful, and eventually they began to believe it.

It's very common for children to unconsciously form limiting beliefs around money at an early age. These types of limiting beliefs are referred to as "imprints" in the field of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). An imprint is basically a memory that is formed at an early age, and can serve as a root for both the limiting and empowering beliefs that we may form as children. Some of the beliefs that we may develop at early ages are not always healthy, and are created as a result of a traumatic or confusing experience that we have forgotten. How we unconsciously and consciously view the world in terms of money is generally based on such beliefs.

Identifying your limiting beliefs is a critical first step. Once you've identified what some of those underlying imprints/beliefs are, you can use different NLP and life coaching processes to quickly move through those obstacles, thus allowing you to see and experience all of the financial opportunities that are really available to you.

Beliefs About Possibility

The primary psychological difference between those who do well financially and those who don't revolves around beliefs about possibility. For example, many people don't even view financial success as an option. They don't have the capability to open themselves up to all of the possibilities that are available for achieving prosperity. Often they'll get stuck in a monthly routine and are unwilling to take risks or try something different because they're afraid that they'll end up being worse off than they already are. What these people don't realize is that it's common to have to take a step backward in order to move forward.

Many millionaires have gone bankrupt at some time in their life and then in a short time will completely turn their financial situation around for the better. Moreover, many people who start up their own businesses often lose money in the beginning. However, they do this, trusting that their new business will expand to a point where they're earning a nice salary while collecting a tidy profit.

Not everyone has to take risks or step backwards to get ahead, though it's important to consciously open yourself up to the idea of what is possible for you. In order to embrace this idea, you must first have the ability to change your daily routine by doing something different. This includes learning how to view your world through the eyes of prosperity and abundance, instead of lack and poverty.

Try this on for a moment:

Think about something that you want and all of the possibilities that you have in achieving it. Ask yourself, "What is possible?"

Now try something different.

Think of something that you don't have, but that you'd like to have. Think about all the reasons why you don't have it and how you wish you could have it.

Notice which one of those makes you feel better.

Hopefully, the first statement made you feel better because it was designed to expand your unconscious and conscious frames around wealth and prosperity. It's amazing what can happen to a person once they change their attitude and beliefs about possibility. Once people begin to shift their thinking, they start seeing results almost instantaneously. The shifts may be small at first, but as they continue to embrace their new way of positive thinking, a lot of magic opens up for them.

For example, many years ago a number of Vietnamese "boat people" immigrated into the United States. Many Americans were concerned about the strain that would be created on welfare and other government services as a result of these people coming into the country. Interestingly, many of the Vietnamese who went into business for themselves ended up doing extremely well. Why is that?

An obvious answer might have to do with the fact that the Vietnamese people came from a country where if they said the wrong thing, they would get shot. Then they came to the United States where the worst thing that could happen was that someone would call them on the phone and harass them because they didn't pay a bill.

If you come from a world where death is a moment to moment reality to a place where options are endless, then there is no reason not to try everything. Instead of being angry or bitter about having to leave their country, they were grateful to be alive. Instead of sulking in self-pity, many of them adopted a creative attitude that revolved around the question, "What is possible?"

Consequently, when they moved here, two or three Vietnamese families would live in a confined space. They went out and got minimum wage jobs and pooled all of their money together. When they got enough money, they would buy a business and the whole family would start working at the business. Once the business became fairly successful, they would buy a piece of real estate. Then they would buy more real estate, and so on.

For these Vietnamese people, success was an affirmation of what is possible, because everything was possible to them. All they had to do was prioritize what they wanted, and then categorize the different possibilities in achieving. Instead of feeling sorry for themselves, they stayed positive and kept a laser beam focus on their long-term goal of wealth and financial prosperity. People can do anything they want. The question is: what are they willing to do to get to their possible outcome?

Wealth is a State of Mind

Often people will confuse who they are with how much money they make. Whether someone makes a million dollars a year or $15,000 a year, everyone still has the capability to achieve a certain degree of financial abundance in their life.

For example, when the Nazi's took over in Germany, there were very many wealthy people in the society who had their lives ripped away from them and they ended up in concentration camps. Viktor E. Frankle or Anne Frank were in situations of the worst poverty, yet they actually had an abundant life.

In Man's Search for Meaning, author Viktor E. Frankle said that the one thing that a person has that can never be taken away from them is their attitude.

"We who lived in the concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man, but one thing: The last of his freedoms to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."

Frankle, a psychologist, adopted a creative attitude that helped him survive the nightmare of living in a concentration camp. He was able to manifest internal prosperity by exercising his right to do so. This same attitude led him on a path towards achieving and living an abundant life once he got out.

Wealth and Self Worth

When it comes to thinking about prosperity, it's helpful to understand that it's a resource that flows through us. We are a conduit for prosperity. Once this is realized, then we start to identify with the fact that we're the ones who choose how to channel this resource. Viktor Frankle made this distinction in the concentration camps. Every single one of his material possessions were stripped away from him, including his shoes. The only thing he had left, was the ability to believe in himself and to embrace the idea that he was still a good person, despite the fact that everything had been taken away from him. This was an important distinction for Frankle to make, because then having money was no longer a question of his self-worth.

Money doesn't determine who you are; it's simply a resource. Having a strong inner sense of self is what is truly important. Money is merely an external element. Once people stop equating their self-worth with money, then the doors of possibility swing open for them because they're willing to try more things. Once they start feeling better about themselves, they become less fearful and are open to trying something completely different.

It's a matter of getting clear on your financial goals, and then declaring to yourself, "This is what I want and there are several ways of achieving it. There are several possibilities for making it happen. If something doesn't work, then I'll try something else."

And if the next thing doesn't work out, then it's simply feedback that you need to try something else. It doesn't mean that you're a failure or a terrible person. It simply means that there is something out there that will eventually work and that something is outside of you. You are still the same person on the inside, no matter what.

Measuring one's self-worth by how much money one has can be devastating. For example, there was a woman who had 17 million dollars set aside for her in a trust fund by her parents. It would pay her out at least $800,000 a year in interest as long as she was breathing. This person found her identity and self worth in the lifestyle that she lived and how much she owned. During one shopping spree, she spent $18,000 in the lingerie section of her local department store.

Most of the actions that she took when it came to spending large sums of money were the result of comparing herself to her sister. The sister was in the same situation; she also had a trust fund that paid out a lot in interest. However, the sister never looked at money as an aspect of her identity. She never determined her self-worth by how much she had.

All it meant to her was that she had something to fall back on if there was ever a problem. She married and started several businesses with her husband. They became extremely successful in their own right and it turned out that after many years, the income from her trust was relatively small compared to the income generated from the businesses they had developed.

Interestingly, the woman who based her identity and self-worth on her pocketbook spent large sums of money to keep up with her sister. She eventually went bankrupt. This is an extreme example of someone who measures their self worth on how much money they have.

The woman's situation became even more complicated when she started comparing herself with her sister, which is also a statement about her self-worth. It's common for a person to compare their financial status with someone else and, sadly, this is the root of much of the emotional pain that people carry. People have a tendency to compare themselves with their friends, co-workers, family members and so on. When people compare themselves with someone, what they're actually doing is making a judgment about themselves and the other person. At some level they're basing their identity and self worth on external elements.

When someone decides to stop comparing themselves to others, they'll begin to notice amazing shifts in their life because they'll be viewing life from the inside looking out. They'll be internally referenced, which will enhance their self worth and identity because they'll be determining who they are from their own heart. They'll no longer give other people the opportunity to determine who they are, because they'll already know themselves at a very deep and spiritual level. Instead of basing their self worth on external elements like a paycheck, they develop a strong inner sense of self-worth which gives them the courage to try new things-thus expanding their opportunities.

For example, there was a janitor who made only about $1,800 a month. After doing some beliefs work with NLP and financial planning, he decided to start his own business. He began by saving money and then he bought all the supplies that he needed. He kept his regular janitor job, but he took a new cleaning contract on the side. He then got another contract and hired somebody else to help him out. After a period of time he decided to quit his janitor job and started his own cleaning company. He eventually made a tremendous jump in his monthly salary, and had a sense of freedom that he had never experienced before.

What is interesting about this story is that the man was still doing janitorial work. What changed was his self-worth. Instead of thinking, "Oh, I'm just a janitor, I can't do anything else. I'm not smart enough, I'll never be rich," he began thinking, "What is possible? What are some ways that I can achieve wealth? Everybody needs someone to come in and clean. Homes need it, schools need it. They're hiring me to do it, why don't I just get on the other side of the fence and start up my own business!"

That's how you open up possibilities. It starts with a dream. Then it's a matter of turning that dream blueprint into reality. As a person begins to embrace their own self worth and open themselves up to the idea of what is possible, they'll attract wealth and prosperity into their life. The outer world is truly a reflection of our inner world. If someone is feeling good on the inside, generally it will show on the outside and they'll draw positive experiences into their life. That's the way life works.

References
(1) Hallbom, T. and K. Hallbom, Alternative Medicine: The Definitive Guide, (Beverly Hills, CA: The Holistic Book Project, 1993) Neuro-Linguistic Programming, p. 382
(2) Hallbom, T., Dilts, R. and Smith, S., Beliefs: Pathways to Health and Well Being, (Metamorphous Press, 1988
)

The Wealthy Mind Program, offered by Tim and Kristine Hallbom and Armand D'Alo, teaches individuals how to create the attitudes, behaviors, and ways of thinking that deliver wealth. Visit their sites today. www.nlpca.com/ and thewealthymind.com/

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Business Lessons From Usain Bolt

8/13/2012

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Business Lessons from Usain Bolt
By: Cherryl Hanson Simpson


When Usain Bolt finished the 100 metres final of the 2012 London Olympics in a new meet record of 9.63 seconds, the eyes of millions of people were keenly watching his performance. With his brilliant accomplishment, the Jamaican sprint star demonstrated to his many fans around the world that he is indeed a legend in his own time.

In addition to his athletic prowess, I am inspired by Bolt for reasons outside of the sporting arena. After the 2009 Berlin World Athletics Championships, I reflected on some of the lessons that the sprinter could teach us about money. Discipline, self-belief and persistence were just some of Bolt's habits that could also help us to achieve our personal and financial goals.

Bolt's attitudes, actions and achievements continue to give us examples that are worthy of emulating. After watching him win another gold medal for Jamaica last Sunday, my thoughts turned to areas in his life that could educate and encourage entrepreneurs. Let's look at some of the business lessons that we can learn from Bolt.

Choose a business that you love

It has been said that if you find a job doing what you love, you'll never work a day in your life. Watching Bolt run, it is obvious that he enjoys his life's work of competing in athletic events around the world. With a smile on his face and a dance in his step, Bolt makes the arduous mission of winning races look almost easy.

Similarly, running a business can be more fulfilling if you are operating in a field that you really love. An entrepreneur's life can often be filled with challenges; so when the tough times come, it is easier to keep going if you are truly motivated by your daily tasks. You will also find it easier to attract customers when you are passionate about your business.

Be an expert in your field

I am quite sure that Bolt would not enjoy his athletic career as much if he wasn't very good at it. One of the reasons that he is reaping bountiful rewards is that he is an expert sprinter who always delivers exceptional results. While Bolt's ability to perform well is partially due to his innate talent, it is also a product of many hours of gruelling training and strategic coaching.

While it's great to be fond of what you do in business, more is required for your success as an entrepreneur. It is important to be knowledgeable and proficient in your field of endeavour, as you need to provide outstanding offerings to attract and maintain your customers. Whatever your business, ensure that you continually seek advice and development to upgrade your operation.

Keep your customers happy

It is a pleasure to see the tremendous response that Bolt receives from his fans wherever he goes. As a natural showman both on and off the track, he knows how to please his audience and leave them wanting more. Despite the pressures that come with being in the public eye, Bolt always seems to be happy to sign autographs, pose for pictures and make charity appearances.

If you want your business to stand out from the rest, take a page from Bolt's book. Think about how you can 'wow' your customers by meeting their needs, offering incentives, and going above and beyond the call of duty to serve them. What would it take for your customers to leave with a smile on their faces and the resolve to come back for more of your product or service?

Marketing makes the difference

With his engaging personality, photo-ready antics and viral 'To Di Worl' pose, Bolt is a marketer's dream come true. He has been able to attract many sponsors because he delivers a package that goes beyond his ability to run. His promotional income could outperform his on-track earnings, and places him among other sports superstars such as Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods.

To increase the earning capacity of your business, make use of innovative marketing tactics. Even if you have the best product or service in the world, you won't get sales if no one knows who you are or where to find you. Like Bolt, go for the international stage by using strategies such as online sales and social media involvement to market your business.

Don't get complacent

As Bolt discovered recently, if you underestimate your competitors it can have devastating results. When 100-metre World Champion Yohan Blake stunned the world by beating him twice at the Jamaica national trials, it was definitely a wake-up call for Bolt to focus more on his preparations to defend his Olympic titles.

While Bolt was able to recover quickly and regain his position as the world's fastest man, it may not be so easy to reclaim a lost business advantage. If you're doing well in your enterprise, be aware that the competition has its sights set on taking your place. Use surveys, focus groups and direct communication to ensure that you stay on top of changing customer demands in your industry.

So as you celebrate Bolt's phenomenal victory, think of other ways in which he could inspire you to be more successful in business!

Cherryl Hanson Simpson is a Jamaican entrepreneur, Money-Coach, Business mentor, and founder of Financially S.M.A.R.T. Services. She enjoys talking and listening to people and helping them to achieve their dreams. Her upcoming book, "The 3 Ms of Money" will reveal all the secrets she learned about financial success. Read more about Cherryl at: http://financiallysmartadvice.com and http://entrepreneursinjamaica.com/

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The Honeymoon Effect

7/10/2012

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The honeymoon effect
By Jurriaan Kamp
Editor-in-Chief, Ode Magazine


Biologist Bruce Lipton on how to use the creative wishes of the conscious mind to lead a healthier, happier life.

I want people to understand 
that we are creating this world. That we are creating our own lives. That our realities and experiences are not accidents.”

At the end of a long conversation about cell membranes, evolution and (sub)consciousness, I ask Bruce Lipton what his most important message is. The response comes without a moment’s hesitation, and with his characteristically enthusiastic voice, he sounds like yet another self-help guru or motivational speaker. But he isn’t.

Bruce Lipton is a stem-cell biologist who taught at the University of Wisconsin’s School of Medicine and performed pioneering research at Stanford University before writing his bestselling book, The Biology of Belief, in 2005. His message does not come from quick pop interpretations of quantum mechanics but from work with cell cultures in a lab. These experiments showed that environments and circumstances not genetic makeup, dictate how cells behave. For Lipton, genes don’t control our lives; our environment does, and more importantly, our perception of that environment.

Preparing for my meeting with Lipton, I was struck by various reports in newspapers and magazines about pharmaceutical companies developing drugs that target mutations in specific genes and about collaborations between big pharma corporations and biotech startups promising a new growth market for medicine. The message was very different from Lipton’s: Now we’re cracking the genome; we’re about to discover the causes of many diseases. The time for even smarter—and even more profitable—medicines has come. Lipton call this “the central dogma”: DNA controls all biological life as we know it.

“I used to embrace the central dogma, and I taught genetic determinism at medical school,” says Lipton. The argument, first stated by the English molecular biologist Francis Crick in 1958, swung the pendulum in the nature-versus-nurture debate decidedly toward nature. It was a depressing concept to Lipton. “We don’t pick our genes. Genetic determinism basically says whatever happens to us is a consequence of the genes we received at birth. That means my fate is not in my hands anymore. We become victims of our genes.”

Apart from that fatalistic outcome and despite all the pharmaceutical claims of individually based genetic medicine, genetic determinism may have had its day. Lipton’s research shows a different perspective. He took genetically identical stem cells and put them into separate Petri dishes and then changed the environment. He saw cell cultures crashing in bad environments and instantaneously recovering their health when they were moved back to good and supportive environments. Identical cells developed in different directions when the environment was changed. Different information led genes to evolve in different ways. So genes don’t control life; they respond to information.

“It’s the environment, stupid,” Lipton writes of his experiments in The Biology of Belief. Lipton’s discoveries are part of an emerging new biological paradigm that presents a radically different view of the evolution of life: epigenetics. Epi means “above” in Greek, so epigenetics means control above the genes. “It turns out that as we move from one environment to another environment, we change our genetic readout,” Lipton says. “Or if we perceive that our environment is not supporting us, then that perception also changes our genetics.”

The implications are profound. Change your environment, and you can change how you think. “We are not locked into our fate, because we have the freedom to change the way we respond to the world,” he explains. “We are masters of our genetics rather than victims of our hereditary traits. Our fate is really based on how we see the world or on how we have been programmed to experience it.”

When he fully grasped the meaning of epigenetics, Lipton’s life took a radical turn. He left the lab and the academic world, wrote his book and began to teach. He realized that whereas the scientific community is gradually embracing epigenetics as an alternative to the “central dogma,” the general public is largely unaware of the impact these new insights could have on our daily lives. “The media worsens the situation by misleading the public with a neverending onslaught of stories presumably identifying a gene that controls this cancer or that malady,” Lipton writes in The Biology of Belief.

So Lipton is on a mission to explain how our realities are created by our beliefs. “We know from science that our genes don’t control our lives, but if we believe that they do, they do,” Lipton says. To change our reality, we need to change our beliefs. That’s why the subtitle of The Biology of Belief is Unleashing the Power of Consciousness, Matter and Miracles. That’s also why Lipton operates in a field seemingly populated by self-help gurus who talk about the New Age “law of attraction,” which states that focused positive thought will lead to the desired outcome. Same message, different—non-scientific—inspiration.

The challenge of changing beliefs has become a key part of Lipton’s work. He talks as much about consciousness and the mind as about his past experiments in the lab. “The function of the mind is to create coherence between our beliefs and the reality that we experience,” he says. “So whatever we have programmed into our minds, those beliefs will shape not just our genetics but our behavior to conform to those beliefs as well. If we have positive beliefs built in our minds, then our behavior and our genes will lead us to health and happiness.”

Still, the way to health and happiness à la Lipton is more than positive thinking. “We generally perceive that we are running our lives with our wishes and our desires,” Lipton continues. “But neuroscience reveals a startling fact: We only run our lives with our creative, conscious mind about 5 percent of the time. Ninety-five percent of the time, our life is controlled by the beliefs and habits that are programmed in the subconscious mind. You may hold some positive thoughts but that has very little influence on your life because of the limited amount of time you actually run with your conscious mind.”

Even though we may embrace the message that we can change our reality by changing our beliefs, it is hard for us to change our beliefs because we mostly run our lives on autopilot.

Lipton explains that there is a good reason for the automatic “playback” function of the subconscious mind. As children, we learn to walk. While we do so, our lives are determined by the process. It takes all our energy and attention. The same happens when we learn to drive later in life. But once we have acquired these new habits, the subconscious mind automates the procedure. Whatever seemed almost overwhelmingly difficult at one point now is simple. We don’t even think about it anymore when we put one foot in front of the other or drive home from work.

However, we don’t just record simple motor functions like walking or driving. In the same way, we also record perceptions and behaviors. And we do most of this recording in the womb, during the second trimester of pregnancy, and during the first six years of our lives. “The fundamental programs in your subconscious mind are not your own wishes and desires,” Lipton points out. “They are behaviors you copied from other people, primarily your parents and your family and community. Your beliefs are actually their beliefs, their wishes and desires. You are ‘playing’ behaviors that were downloaded into you when you were a small child. And it is not very likely that these behaviors are what you are looking for today. You are sabotaging yourself!”

This is, of course, not a new discovery. Sigmund Freud used psychoanalysis to uncover these programmed patterns. Psychoanalysis and psychotherapy may have brought a better understanding of why we behave as we do, but people rarely succeed in fundamentally changing their lives through these methods.

Lipton points to the different ways in which the conscious and the subconscious minds learn. The conscious mind learns through inspiration: reading a book, going to a movie, having an exciting conversation with a friend or a teacher. The subconscious mind is not creative and it automates procedures, or forms habits, at low frequencies in different parts of the brain. “You can talk to a tape recorder all you want; you won’t be able to change the program. You have to re-record to change the program,” Lipton says. This explains why insights one may gain from a good psychotherapy session do not necessarily translate into different behavior, different fundamental beliefs and therefore a different reality. Its insights speak to the wrong mind.

The good news is that more and more promising techniques to deal with the subconscious mind are being discovered at this moment. Lipton speaks about good results with hypnosis, subliminal tapes and “super learning” techniques. He dedicates a special section in his book The Biology of Belief to a simple energy-psychology technique called PSYCH-K that personally helped him undo “self-limiting beliefs.” All these techniques feed information directly into the subconscious. “Using these modalities, you can rewrite beliefs that you may have held in your subconscious mind for already 45 years in a matter of just minutes,” Lipton explains. “In 15 minutes, you can change a belief that has been affecting your whole life.”

The impact on medicine is profound. “Our health is really based on our perception and our beliefs and attitudes,” he says. “When we find ourselves in a negative environment, or we perceive ourselves in a negative environment or we are running from behavioral programs that are self-sabotaging, these beliefs generally contribute to disease. If you want to recover health, you don’t need to add medicine. You actually have to return yourself to a supportive, healthy environment. I have seen in the lab that cell cultures can crash and then recover when their environment is improved.”

To illustrate his point, he adds that research has shown that 90 percent of the cases of cancer and heart disease, the two biggest killers on the planet, have nothing to do with genes but everything to do with lifestyle. “A lot of medicine comes down to adding chemicals to support unhealthy lifestyles,” Lipton argues. “It is not about healing people but about helping people to maintain a lifestyle. You don’t need these drugs. What you need to change is your lifestyle. You don’t need a doctor; you need a coach. That’s what the new medicine is all about.”

Yet that radical vision faces a major obstacle: A pharmaceutical company with a mission to improve health through techniques that cannot be patented would not be very profitable for its shareholders. “Theoretically, medicine is a compassionate practice; it is about helping people,” Lipton says. “But in reality, it is not. Mainstream medicine generates profits from sick people. That is by definition inhumane. Medicine has to be nonprofit. Once you put the profit motive in there, then healing people would minimize the profit of the corporation. Obviously, money doesn’t create healing. It’s the opposite: Money prevents healing.”

A conversation with Lipton is more like a high-speed monologue. A simple question unleashes a torrent of words from his brain. Although we speak over Skype, I can sense the urgency with which he wants to tell the story of how we can lead healthier and happier lives.

He tells about the day he was 7, when he peeked through a microscope in the classroom for the first time. Afterward, he ran home and begged his mother to buy him one. Lipton had seen his future. More important, he had seen a tiny world bursting with life. What he saw through the microscope was not a “thing”; it was a community, with endless elements and pieces moving together.

“Even the most primitive organisms on the planet, bacteria, all live in community,” he says. “They are always in communication with each other. Organisms don’t live alone. The more complex systems become, the more sharing of the workload, you see.” He pauses briefly. “You are not an individual. You are not a single entity. That is a misperception. You are a community of 50 trillion cells.”

Lipton’s second book is called Spontaneous Evolution: Our Positive Future (and a Way to Get There from Here). Darwinian biology, with its focus on the survival of the fittest, has led us onto the wrong path, according to Lipton. “When you start talking about the survival of the fittest, you start talking about the individual. Nature doesn’t really care about individuals.” From the perspective of evolution, it is not about the individual human being; for Lipton, it is about humanity. “We are not individual entities; we are one giant collaborative superorganism,” he says.

Lipton argues that a revolution will occur when we recognize that each human being is a “cell” in the same body. “We may learn that killing or terrorizing each other or our environment is self-destructive. In fact, there is a name for what we do. When the cells in our bodies fight each other, we call that ‘autoimmune disease.’ What humanity is going through right now is a very bad case of autoimmune disease.”

Yet Lipton is optimistic about the future. “I used to be a pessimist,” he says. “When I started to understand the nature of evolution and how everything is powered by the formation of community, then I saw that the emergence of the Internet is doing exactly that—it allows all the cells to be connected. We are beginning to see the coalition of human beings from around the world recognizing that we are all one. That’s our evolutionary destiny.”

Lipton takes hope from what he calls the “honeymoon effect.” We all remember moments when we were deeply in love. We felt healthy and energetic. Life was so beautiful it was like heaven on Earth. “That honeymoon effect was not an accident; it was a creation,” Lipton argues. “You personally created that.”

When we fall in love, our conscious minds, with our wishes and desires, are running almost full-time—not 5 percent of the time, but 95 percent. That condition can be life-changing. “The only difference between heaven and hell on this planet is the difference between running on the creative wishes of the conscious mind or running on the sabotaging, disempowering beliefs of the subconscious mind.”

Lipton pauses, then raises a question. What if you programmed or reprogrammed your subconscious to contain the same wishes and desires from the conscious mind that created the honeymoon experience? “At that point, we would all be living in heaven on Earth all the time.”

Jurriaan Kamp has always believed in heaven on Earth.

Reprinted with Permission. Article Source: Ode Magazine

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No Excuses! Just Get it Done!

6/6/2012

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There is an adage that says, "Show me an excuse, and I will show you a failure!" Emmy-award winning actress Kathryn Joosten certainly wasn't someone wallowing in excuses!

Some of us can learn quite a few things from this woman of action!

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Habits for Happiness!...

6/4/2012

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Believe is Believing

5/23/2012

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                                 Believe is Believing


Whether you are aware of them, or not, whether you perceive them as useful, or not, beliefs exert a tremendous amount of force upon our lives. They shape and influence our behaviors, dictating how we live.

Thinking of the beliefs you are conscious of as things - you are believing – does several things: It changes them from a nominalization (noun) into a verb, thereby allowing you to experience and realize that what you are believing isn’t static – it has movement. And as such can be altered, strengthened or weakened

Information, be it: resources, personal metaphors/meanings, emotions, images, sounds, etc. contained in our memories (past experience-s) and/or in our future plans (hopes and dreams) cyclically interact with our reigning beliefs to strengthen them. For example, an athlete with a healthy, successful history of winning in his or her chosen sport will most likely have a current belief (believing) co-operating with their illustrious past. This combination acts as an additive, aiding this athlete in winning their next competitive event. Seven-time Tour De France winner Lance Armstrong comes to mind.

This looping effect is also true for someone without an enriched past, but has a compelling and attractive future collaborating with their present beliefs (believing). The phrase, “you have a bright and healthy future in front you” comes to mind.

The reverse is also valid; elements contained either in our past and/or in our future can weaken our beliefs. For example, a person can possess a firm belief, believing that they can be an incredible public-speaker. However, if they allow what they perceive as negative and unhealthy images, sounds, emotions, etc. from their past and/or future to constantly interfere with what they are believing, they will have difficulty making their goal a reality. In short, if a belief and its support contradict each other the belief short-circuits itself.

To strengthen beliefs and their support various techniques abound. One such technique is reframing. Simply put, reframing is taking what is interpreted as a negative experience and looking at it from an empowering point of view. This technique also aids in transforming disempowering emotions into useful (use fuel) ones.

This reminds me of the skilled boxer who had a string of successful bouts. He eventually lost one of his fights. Instead of looking at this experience as a true loss, this swift pugilist saw at it as - an opportunity to further learn and to further improve – upon his technique for subsequent matches – which he eventually won. In short, this boxer was mentally agile to reframe his ring experiences and use them to fortify his beliefs for future fights. The Greatest of all time comes to mind.

Reframing may be used in any type of interpersonal communication and relationships, i.e. sales and customer service couples and friend’s relationships, etc. In sales clients sometimes get in their own way of something that is good for them because of an unpleasant past sales experience. Reframing the client’s past experiences also assists in freeing the positive emotions that are then used to procure a win/win sale.


© Copyright – John G. Johnson 2012 - All rights reserved! Subscribe to our mailing list for workshops, newsletters and events. Go to:  www.nlpsuccessbydesign.com
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